House of Mourning

It says in the book of Ecclesiastes, there is "a time for tearing and a time for sewing." The loss of a loved one leaves a tear in the fabric of our lives. We hope this page can serve as the thread that assists in the mending process during your time of loss.

Here you can find downloadable prayer books & audio mourning prayers, text versions of prayers & readings, links to make donations & purchase memorial plaques in memory of a loved one, and information about bereavement support.

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On-Line Resources

Click the buttons below to listen to the prayers Beth Or uses during mourning.

Recordings: Shiva Minyan Prayers

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Prayers & Readings

Scroll down to find the Hebrew, Transliterations and English text used for funerals, shiva, and Yahrzeit, including:

• El Malei Rachamim (Masculine & Feminine versions)
• Mourner's Kaddish
• Psalm 23 - A Psalm of David
• The Ship
• It is a Fearful Thing of Love
• In the Rising
• Prayer Before Lighting Yahrzeit Candle
• Prayer When Yahrzeit Candle is Lit

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EL MALEI RACHAMIM - Masculine Language - Hebrew 

אֵל מָלֵא רַחֲמִים שׁוֹכֵן בַּמְּרוֹמִים הַמְצֵא מְנוּחָה נְכוֹנָה תַּחַת כַּנְפֵי הַשְּׁכִינָה בְּמַעֲלוֹת קְדוֹשִׁים וּטְהוֹרִים כְּזוֹהַר הָרָקִיעַ מַזְהִירִיםאֶתנִשְׁמַת

___________בֵּן _____________

שֶׁהָלַךְ לְעוֹלָמוֹ בַּעַל הָרַחֲמִים יַסְתִּירֵהוּ בְּסֵתֶר כְּנָפָיו לְעוֹלָמִים וְיִצְרֹר בִּצְרוֹר הַחַיִּים אֶת נִשְׁמָתוֹ ה' הוּא נַחֲלָתוֹ וְיָנוּחַ בְּשָׁלוֹם עַל מִשְׁכָּבוֹ וְנֹאמַר אָמֵן

 

EL MALEI RACHAMIM - Masculine Language - Hebrew Transliteration

Al molay rachamim, shochayn bam’romim, ham-tzay m’nucha n’chona al kanfay Hash’china, b’ma-alot k’doshim ut-horim k’zo-har haraki-a mazhirim, et nishmat (Name of the Deceased) she-halach l-olomo, ba-avur shenodvu tz’dakah b’ad hazkarat nishmata. B’Gan Ayden t’hay m’nuchata; la-chayn Ba-al Harachamim yas-tire-ha b’sayter k’nafav l’olamim, v’yitz-ror bitz-ror hacha-yim et nishmatah, Ado-nay Hu na-chalatah, v’tanu-ach b’shalom al mishkavah. V’nomar: Amayn

 

EL MALEI RACHAMIM – Feminine Language - Hebrew

אֵל מָלֵא רַחֲמִים שׁוֹכֵן בַּמְּרוֹמִים הַמְצֵא מְנוּחָה נְכוֹנָהתַּחַתכַּנְפֵי הַשְּׁכִינָה בְּמַעֲלוֹת קְדוֹשִׁים וּטְהוֹרִים כְּזוֹהַר הָרָקִיעַ מַזְהִירִים אֶת נִשְׁמַת

____________בַּת ___________________

שֶׁהָלְכָה לְעוֹלָמָהּ בַּעַל הָרַחֲמִים יַסְתִּירֵהָ בְּסֵתֶר כְּנָפָיו לְעוֹלָמִים וְיִצְרֹר בִּצְרוֹר הַחַיִּים אֶת נִשְׁמָתַהּ ה' הוּא נַחֲלָתַהּ וְתָנוּחַ בְּשָׁלוֹם עַל מִשְׁכָּבַהּ וְנֹאמַר אָמֵן

 

EL MALEI RACHAMIM – Feminine Language - Hebrew Transliteration

Al molay rachamim, shochayn bam’romim, ham-tzay m’nucha n’chona al kanfay Hash’china, b’ma-alot k’doshim ut-horim k’zo-har haraki-a mazhirim, et nishmat (Name of the Deceased) she-halcha l-olomoh, ba-avur shenodvu tz’dakah b’ad hazkarat nishmatah. B’Gan Ayden t’hay m’nuchatah; la-chayn Ba-al Harachamim yas-tire-ha b’sayter k’nafav l’olamim, v’yitz-ror bitz-ror hacha-yim et nishmatah, Ado-nay Hu na-chalatah, v’tanu-ach b’shalom al mishkavah. V’nomar: Amayn.

 

EL MALEI RACHAMIM - English

God full of compassion, You dwell in the heights and in the depths: grant prefect test under the wings of Your Presence to (Name of Deceased), our loved one who has entered eternity. Let her/him find refuge forever in the shadow of Your wing and let her/his soul be bound up in the bond of eternal life; for You, the Everlasting God, are her/his influence. May she/he rest in peace, and let us say: Amen.

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MOURNER'S KADDISH - Hebrew

יִתְגַּדַּל וְיִתְקַדַּשׁ שְׁמֵהּ רַבָּא
בְּעָלְמָא דִּי בְרָא כִרְעוּתֵהּ וְיַמְלִיךְ מַלְכוּתֵהּ בְּחַיֵּיכון וּבְיומֵיכון וּבְחַיֵּי דְכָל בֵּית יִשרָאֵל בַּעֲגָלָא וּבִזְמַן קָרִיב, וְאִמְרוּ אָמֵן
יְהֵא שְׁמֵהּ רַבָּא מְבָרַךְ לְעָלַם וּלְעָלְמֵי עָלְמַיָּא
יִתְבָּרַךְ וְיִשְׁתַּבַּח וְיִתְפָּאַר וְיִתְרומַם וְיִתְנַשּא וְיִתְהַדָּר וְיִתְעַלֶּה וְיִתְהַלָּל שְׁמֵהּ דְּקֻדְשָׁא.

בְּרִיךְ הוּא
לְעֵלָּא מִן כָּל בִּרְכָתָא וְשִׁירָתָא תֻּשְׁבְּחָתָא וְנֶחֱמָתָא דַּאֲמִירָן בְּעָלְמָא. וְאִמְרוּ אָמֵן
יְהֵא שְׁלָמָא רַבָּא מִן שְׁמַיָּא וְחַיִּים עָלֵינוּ וְעַל כָּל יִשרָאֵל. וְאִמְרוּ אָמֵן
עושה שָׁלום בִּמְרומָיו הוּא יַעֲשה שָׁלום עָלֵינוּ וְעַל כָּל יִשרָאֵל וְאִמְרוּ אָמֵן

 

MOURNER'S KADDISH - Hebrew Transliteration

Yitgadal v’yitkadash sh’mei raba

b’alma di-v’ra chirutei, v’yamlich malchutei

b’chayeichon uvyomeichon uvchayei d’chol beit yisrael

ba’agala uvizman kariv, v’im’ru: Amen.

Y’hei sh’mei raba m’varach l’alam ul’almei almaya.

Yitbarach v’yishtabach, v’yitpa’ar v’yitromam v’yitnaseh

v’yithadar v’yit’aleh v’yit’halal sh’mei d’kud’sha

b’rich hu,

l’eila min-kol-birchata v’shirata, tushb’chata

v’nechemata da’amiran b’alma, v’im’ru: Amen.

Y’hei shlama raba min-sh’maya v’chayim aleinu v’al

kol-yisrael. v’im’ru: Amen.

Oseh shalom bimromav, hu ya’aseh shalom

Aleinu v’al kol-yisrael, v’imru: Amen.

 

MOURNER'S KADDISH - English

EXALTED and hallowed be God’s great name

in the world that God created, according to plan.

May God’s majesty be revealed all the days of our lifetime

and the life of Israel— speedily, imminently. To which we say: Amen.

Blessed be God’s great name to all eternity.

Blessed, praised, honored, exalted, extolled, glorified, adored, and lauded

be the name of the Holy Blessed One, beyond all earthly words and songs

of blessing, praise, and comfort. To which we say: Amen.

May there be abundant peace from heaven, and Iife, for us and All Israel.

To which we say: Amen.

May the One who creates harmony on high, bring peace to us and to all Israel.

To which we say: Amen.

May God grant peace to those who mourn and comfort to those who are bereaved.

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PSALM 23 - A PSALM OF DAVID - Hebrew

 

מִזְמ֥וֹר לְדָוִ֑ד יְהוָ֥ה רֹ֝עִ֗י לֹ֣א אֶחְסָֽר׃

בִּנְא֣וֹת דֶּ֭שֶׁא יַרְבִּיצֵ֑נִי עַל־מֵ֖י מְנֻח֣וֹת יְנַהֲלֵֽנִי׃

נַפְשִׁ֥י יְשׁוֹבֵ֑ב יַֽנְחֵ֥נִי בְמַעְגְּלֵי־צֶ֝֗דֶק לְמַ֣עַן שְׁמֽוֹ׃

גַּ֤ם כִּֽי־אֵלֵ֨ךְ בְּגֵ֪יא צַלְמָ֡וֶת לֹא־אִ֘ירָ֤א רָ֗ע כִּי־אַתָּ֥ה עִמָּדִ֑י שִׁבְטְךָ֥ וּ֝מִשְׁעַנְתֶּ֗ךָ הֵ֣מָּה יְנַֽחֲמֻֽנִי׃

תַּעֲרֹ֬ךְ לְפָנַ֨י ׀ שֻׁלְחָ֗ן נֶ֥גֶד צֹרְרָ֑י דִּשַּׁ֖נְתָּ בַשֶּׁ֥מֶן רֹ֝אשִׁ֗י כּוֹסִ֥י רְוָיָֽה׃

אַ֤ךְ ׀ ט֤וֹב וָחֶ֣סֶד יִ֭רְדְּפוּנִי כָּל־יְמֵ֣י חַיָּ֑י וְשַׁבְתִּ֥י בְּבֵית־יְ֝הוָ֗ה לְאֹ֣רֶךְ יָמִֽים׃

 

PSALM 23 - A PSALM OF DAVID - Hebrew Transliteration

PSALM 23 - A PSALM OF DAVID - English

The Lord is my shepherd: I shall not want,

He maketh me to lie down in green pastures

He leads me beside the still waters

He restoreth my soul;

He guideth me in straight paths for His name’s sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley

of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil.

For Thou art with me:

Thy rod and Thy staff, they comfort me.

Thou prepares a table  before me

In the presence of mine enemies.

Thou hast anointed my head with oil;

My cup runneth over.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me

all the days of my life;

And I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

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THE SHIP

What is dying
I am standing on the seashore, a ship sails in the morning breeze and starts for the ocean.
She is an object of beauty and I stand watching her till at last she fades on the horizon and someone at my side says: "She is gone."
Gone!
Where
Gone from my sight that is all.
She is just as large in the masts, hull and spars as she was when I saw her, and just as able to bear her load of living freight to its destination.
The diminished size and total loss of sight is in me, not in her, and just at the moment when someone at my side says,
"She is gone"
there are others who are watching her coming, and other voices take up a glad shout:
"There she comes!"
and that is dying.

     - Bishop Brent

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IT IS A FEARFUL THING TO LOVE

It is a fearful thing to love

what death can touch.

A fearful thing to love,

hope, dream: To be —

to be, and oh, to lose.

A thing for fools this, and

a holy thing,

a holy thing to love.

For

your life has lived in me,

your laugh once lifted me,

your word was a gift to me.

To remember this brings a painful joy.

'Tis a human thing, love,

a holy thing,

to love

what death has touched.

     - Chaim Stein  

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IN THE RISING 

In the rising of the sun, and in its going down,

we remember them.

In the blowing of the wind and in the chill of winter,

we remember them.

In the opening of buds and in the rebirth of spring,

we remember them.

In the blueness of the sky and in the warmth of summer,

we remember them.

In the rustling of the leaves and the beauty of autumn,

we remember them.

In the beginning of the year and when it ends,

we remember them.

When we are weary and in need of strength,

we remember them.

When we are lost and sick at heart,

we remember them.

When we have joys we yearn to share,

we remember them.

So long we live, they, too, shall live,

for they are now a part of us, as we remember them.

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PRAYER BEFORE LIGHTING YAHRZEIT MEMORIAL

The family is gathered at dusk on the evening before the anniversary of the death.

A GROUP SAYS:

At this moment, in memory of our beloved (Name of Deceased),  we join hands in

love and remembrance. A link has been broken in the chain that has bound us

together, yet strong bonds of home and love hold us each to each other.

We give thanks for the blessing of life, of companionship and of memory. We are

grateful for the strength and faith that sustained us in the hour of our bereavement.

though sorrow lingers, we have learned that love is stronger than death. Though

 our loved one is beyond our sight, we do not despair, for we sense our beloved in

 our hearts as a living presence.

AN INDIVIDUAL SAYS:

At this moment, I pause for thought in memory of our beloved (Name of Deceased)

I give thanks for the blessing of life, of companionship and of memory. I am grateful

for the strength and faith that sustained me in the hour of my bereavement. Though

sorrow lingers, I have learned that love is stronger than death. Though my loved one

is beyond my sight, I do not despair, for I sense my beloved in my heart as a living presence.

The 23rd Psalm or another favorite passage from a prayer book might now be recited.

Sustained by words of faith, comforted by precious memories we (I) kindle the Yahrzeit light in remembrance. As this light bums pure and clear, so may the blessed memory of the goodness of our (my) dear (Name of Deceased) illuminate our souls (my soul).

     - from On the Doorposts of Your House

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THE YAHRZEIT LIGHT IS KINDLED

Masculine: זִכְרוֹנוֹ לִבְרָכָה

Zich-ro-no li-v’ra-cha

His memory is a blessing.

Feminine: זִכְרוֹנָהּ לִבְרָכָה

Zich-ronah li-v’racha

Her memory is a blessing.

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Donations & Memorials

In memory of your dear one, it is most fitting and in the true tradition of our heritage and its custom of giving tzedakah, to make a contribution to any of the Congregation’s Funds. 

If you would like to purchase a permanent plaque in memory of a loved one in our Memorial Alcove, kindly complete this form. Loved ones remembered in this way will have their names included in our yahrzeit and yizkor lists in perpetuity.

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Bereavement Support

If you or a family member are in need of additional help coping with the loss of a loved one, Beth Or is here for you. We run a Bereavement Support Group facilitated by congregant Judy Kurtis LCSW, CCTP, who leads our Mental Health Task Force, along with other certified counselors. The Bereavement Support Group meets monthly (currently on Zoom). For details or to learn about the next meeting, please email Rabbi Gregory Marx or call him, 215-656-5806 x222. Bereavement support is open to all and you may join at anytime.